Hmm, Watcha say?

I am never good at anything. I'm not good in writing, sports, academics, public speaking, not good on everything artsy nor do I have a talent on dancing, singing or acting. I'm just a plain old Jane without a talent, maybe I do have but I haven't discovered it yet. Sometimes I wonder if this is normal. I mean not having something your good at, I wish I could excel on something because it sucks not being good at something. It's all average. Monotonous. But I do not hate myself for that, I still love me because I know I've been trying on fields I'm interested at. I still consider myself extraordinary because I may not be the best but I try. At least I do. At least I'm not that useless. Ha, seriously. You know what I mean. And you've seen them already, through my blogs and doodles.

Here's one of the things I'm interested at aside from writing, photography. I'm not joining the bandwagon of Digital Photography nor do I consider myself a photographer because I am not. I am no pro, I am only a photo-hobbyist. And I don't even consider myself good at it because I am just an amateur here. I do not even have any profile to show you either. I just take photos because I wanted to, sometimes it's vanity, sometimes it's for pleasure, sometimes I just have to and sometimes I just feel like doing so. I'm passionate about it like that. In fact I started taking photos at a very young age, even before I had my own camera at the age of 11.

Why do I heart cameras?

The first camera I ever had was a Film Compact Lens-Shutter camera (not-so-famous brand, I can't even remember the name). I got it when I once stayed in Japan for a vacation, the prize I've won from playing bowling I think, or was it because of a catalog promo? I can't remember either. We also had this black Canon Compact camera back in the 90's but it wasn't mine really so I did not get to use it very often. All of those were film so it was kind of costly, although, it's much better because you can see the real quality of the pictures. The second camera I got was a Polaroid which was a gift. It's not the usual Polaroid with white outlines, the ones my camera produces are photos with designed outlines. It comes in a very small size almost that of a 2x2 picture. Then came the age of Cell phone cameras which I've utilized very much for my daily documentation of vanity, events and whatnot, I am using them until now. The next was my 2-year old Sony Cybershot T70. With this camera, I took a lot of photos, thousands of them. I also took worth-taking videos. I love this camera because it has a lot of features, it's also pink, just saying. If you want to edit photos you can do it straight from the camera, you can even doodle on photos you've taken. The first time I put my hands on it, I found it hard because the language set was Japanese but later on I got used to its functions. It's one of my favorite gadgets. Also, I've had a lot of memories with this camera, concerts, trips, etc. that's why I treasure this one very much. I liked digital photography because of it, taking photos became cheaper because you can just store the photos in memory cards or PCs, although we all know there are pros and cons that comes with it. Finally, the latest camera I own is this Nikon D5000. My first DSLR, I never thought I'd have one. I named it Percy Jackson and I am his Grover, the protector.(OMG, I'm so corny!) I'm trying to discover its features yet because it's kind of new and the manual book was again in Japanese good thing the language settings was in English otherwise I'd be dumbfounded again. So far I'm loving it.

(Isn't it cute? DSC-T70)

I love taking random subjects, from fireworks, sunsets, clouds, flowers, things, people to places, but what I love taking the most are bokehs. Bokeh is the "aesthetic quality of the blur in out-of-focus areas of an image, or the way the lens renders out-of-focus points of light." as defined by Wikipedia. I've always found them beautiful. I wish I can take good quality pictures with bokeh-effect. I've been practicing this art now, but I am also waiting for Christmas season because this is the season of lights, which means more bokehs to take.

So far, here are some of the bokehs I took:

(Morning trial @El Jardin Resort, Bulacan)

(@ NLEX)

And these are the most recent ones, from the point of view of my Uncle's rooftop in Bulacan:

I'm so obsessed with bokehs that I don't even understand why. I found them romantic and very creative. I'd be posting another set once I've taken ones which I think is good enough. Gracias!

Too cute to handle

These planners/journals/notebooks are to die for!

(Back details of the notebook on the right)

Lately I've been impulse buying notebooks-slash-journals-slash-planners at Swell Stuff just because I found them cute. You do not know how it's a struggle to not resist things I want but don't need because I am such a thrifty person. Something like that, someone who's practical. Like when on groceries and I got an item which is expensive my mind goes: Is it worthy? Will I benefit from it? Will I be sad if I did not buy it? And when the answer's no, I bring it back to the shelf where it rightfully belongs. All these thoughts rattle me especially when I'm broke. I cannot afford to buy something I do not need just for the sake of having it. With these journals though, I do not regret. On my previous post I already said I thrifted out on my planner and have one created instead. Yet, a few months later here I am buying all the cute planners I can see. I am a little confusing like that. But don't you agree with me that these are cool finds? After all, it isn't expensive as moleskins and high-end planners wouldn't cost you a thousand bucks. It wouldn't hurt to buy one at all. The covers, inside pages are good and worthy enough. The only thing which bothers me now about these, is the fact that I do not have a good handwriting. It would hurt if I turn these beautiful journals into ugly-ducklings the moment I wrote on them. I should have utilize them in the best manner I can. In time. I'll make sure of that.

Something tells me it's better if I'd leave them alone. I have more journals here anyway, they will just serve as my spare tires for now because they are just too cute to handle.

Going Artsy Fartsy

I am proud and at the same time ashamed to introduce to you my "do-it-yourself-planner", my project this year, "365 Days of Bummer".

Obviously, the title has been adapted from one of my favorite films, The 500 days of Summer. The idea of having this just struck me one January day when I'm looking for a perfect planner for the year. But I can't seem to find the perfect one, some too expensive, some aren't worthy so I thought why not make one for myself? In that way it'd be more personal since I'm the one who'll make it. So I did. Fortunately, I found my USA beef blank notebook and made it all happen. I also put in there 'Expectations and Reality' in exchange of my to-do lists. I just found it appropriate so I can keep track of the things I've done over the week.

It's sad I do not have any talent for art. Pardon me for the latter months, they were crammed so you see really ugly doodles. This is the arty-est I can be, technically. But not really, you should have seen my sketches for TLE when I was in 4th Year. I loved how I've drawn Ronald McDonald and Erap sadly though we have to return the sketches so I didn't get to save them.
Those old days are gone, I'm not good enough anymore.

I've already squeezed in all my talent for art and here goes the labor of love:

(From cover to some random statement)

I still have a lot of pages left so I'm going to use it to enhance my drawing skills. I hope there'd be gradual progress in time. Till next craft yo!

Because I love The Perks Of Being a Wallflower

(The Perks Of Being A Wallflower)

Thanks to my cousin Jam for lending me this AWESOME BOOK: Stephen Chbosky's The Perks of Being a Wallflower.

I'm currently reading this at the same time with Dear John. And Yeah, I'm liking this a lot. It's light yet made a lot of sense, contrary to Jam's belief.

I can't wait for it's movie, 2011! EXCITED! specially that Logan Lerman will play as Charlie and Emma Watson as Sam. Good choice. Yeah, agree that Michael Cera could play Charlie as well but then again it's Logan Lerman, I wouldn't mind at all. Just so you know, I crush him. hahaha.

Going back to the book, You see the cover, the photo of the guy reminds me of Justin Beiber, the haircut and all that looks like him. Anyway, I couldn't say more. Just check out the book if you want, Interesting stories inside. It made sense at least for me.

Subic-ing on a Holy Week

Holy Week went peaceful and I guess I am back to tell you the story on how I spent mine.

First Story (Temptation Island):

I was supposed to go fasting, not on food but on internet usage. CBCP said on a news report before the Holy Week that withdrawing or not doing the usual things you've been doing is one way of fasting sort of what you do on a retreat or a recollection.Texting perse is one and of course the internet as well, because it is no necessity for us but then again if you're used to it it is not so as easy as we think. And so this Holy Week I tried not to go online as a form of sacrifice maybe, I even posted on my status on Facebook that I won't surf the net this Holy Week. I decided to do so since I would be out of town and maybe this is one of the littlest thing I could do in line with the Lenten Season. But then again, Holy Tuesday, I failed to. And its not that I do not have one word but I just have to download and check something before I leave the City. I then thought that the latter surfing on the net would be the last for the week only to find out that the place we stayed in on Subic is a wifi zone. Temptation island right? haha.=)) I left my laptop at home so I thought I was spared from going online, but then my brother and cousins had their gadgets with them and they're all wi-fi capable. Oh snap, the "must-have-been fasting" went opposite. Instead, we went online for like 3 whole days. But the mac isn't mine so I'm kind of regulated with the internet usage but then, I still check my accounts frequently and played some online games and so fasting wasn't successful afterall.It may have been a fault or a failure but I guess, I still spent my Holy Week in a holy manner. Moment of silence, prayers, visited a church and leaving the city behind. I stayed 4 days instead of 3 days since they don't want me to go home even when I really want to. We did have our vacation but we made sure that it would still be a peaceful one.

Second Story (Roadtrip hassles):

When you watch news on, before and after Holy Week, news reports are mostly about traffic advisories. Warning, guiding and telling the motorists on where to go, where traffic is, accidents, and the expressways. This year, there was a new road on where motorists were advised to pass to avoid the traffic on the North-Luzon Express Way, it is called SCTEX or Subic Clark Tarlac Express way. We left Manila at around 9 or 9:30 Maundy Thursday since we are not in a hurry to be in Subic early morning, Mom and the rest woul just follow us by afternoon.Traffic wasn't much a of a hassle by then until we got into toll gates of NLEX. But boy, it can't be compared to the traffic we encountered on SCTEX. Gah, The road was surrounded by mountains, it was a long winding road. Traffic is very vivid even 2 kilometers away from the toll gate, the volume of cars are getting larger. Around a thousand or less I think. We were there for almost six hours. It was quarter to 3 and We didn't take lunch thinking we'll get there by 12 noon but we did not and there were no stop-overs so we just ate sandwiches inside the car. It's funny that people entertain their selves on a traffic jam. There was a foreigner who walked along the long road and smoked maybe he was enjoying the scenery, there was one who jog, some reads inside their cars, some call from their cell phones (I doubt if the reception was good, I do not have a signal then since it was a mountain), some put up their feet so they could relax, others soundtripped,took pictures, some already had car troubles gettin overheat, some drink and eat while I am just trying to text whenever signal's back and observe all of them. The one who caught our attention was a van. The children at the back of the van posted a paper on a window a message: "We are bored!!!" haha. It was nice they even thought of that on a traffic, I should have took a picture of that but I wasn't able to.The road trip was a full of hassles, but it was fun.

Third story (Itchy beach-y):

It was 2004 since I last visited and spent my Holy Week in Subic. There were lots of beaches in Subic and we never missed swimming on it. We went swimming at All Hands Beach, as we also did in 2004. By then, the problem was the rocky sands, you could hurt your feet by walking but the water's fine. Clean. 2009, we had our swimming again, we swam for just like 10 minutes. Very short, because we were feeling something itchy. There was an unknown creature which bites our skin, we later on found that it was a little shrimp. haha. It is transparent so we can't see it. Yeah, it's a hassle as well, but we did not continue swimming since there was a girl from our neighbor cottage who drowned and was on hysteria after. I just took photos of the beautiful beach, it was blue and the water's clear and the sand's not so rocky anymore.

Fourth Story (Spotted):

What's a trip without seeing someone you know or is connected to you? Impossible I say. haha. As I said on my previous blog entries people are connected and it's no destiny that they see each other on a far place. I spotted a model when we were shopping at Nike Outlet and my cousins spotted Senator Pia Cayetano biking. I also spotted some Jamers whom I do not know the names but I recognize the faces. My brother told me that there were Jamers on the village we stayed in, I could not recognize who he was describing until we saw them. Meanwhile, entering the beach I saw someone wearing the AB shirt, by then I already knew he was a Thomasian and an Artlet. I just find it amazing that even in far places there's always someone I knew or I recognize.

I knew this blog entry was long, but I just would like to share that the trip went well, no more traffic when going back and the family or the clan did enjoy and bonded well happily in Subic.Holy Week isn't about vacationing, it's about peace, serenity and holiness.